Are Your Children Humble and Confident?
You want your children to be confident and successful. You want them to go into the world and fulfill their God-given purpose with passion and enthusiasm.
You help them fulfill their hopes and dreams because you want great things for them.
Where does humility fall on your list of things you want for them? And if it's on the list, how in the world are you supposed to help them not become prideful while still encouraging them to be confident?
That's the goal, isn't it? A holy tension. The struggle you and I face every day in ourselves.
Humble confidence . . . knowing that every strength, talent, and ability is a gift to be used for God's glory and every weakness is an opportunity to show God's power to change.
So, how do you and I help our children in an area that we struggle with ourselves?
10 Ways to Teach Your Children Humble Confidence
1. Pray - ask God to help you and your children live with both humility and confidence.
Do not strive in your own strength; cast yourself at the feet of the Lord Jesus, and wait upon Him in the sure confidence that He is with you, and works in you. Strive in prayer; let faith fill your heart–so will you be strong in the Lord, and in the power of His might. ~Andrew Murray
2. Teach them to show respect to everyone with a zero-tolerance for rudeness.
Live as free people, but do not use your freedom as an excuse to do evil. Live as servants of God. Show respect for all people: Love the brothers and sisters of God’s family, respect God, honor the king. 1 Peter 2:16–17
3. Teach them to listen to learn and understand other people's perspectives and feelings.
My mom always asked me two questions after I had a disagreement with a friend.
1. Why do you think they were upset, said what they did, or acted that way?
2. How might you have handled it better?
“Every person that you meet knows something you don’t; learn from them.” ~H. Jackson Brown Jr.
4. Teach them to admit their mistakes and apologize; forgive them and teach them to forgive others.
Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so God can heal you. When a believing person prays, great things happen. James 5:16
Any good apology has 3 parts: 1) I’m sorry. 2) It’s my fault. 3) What can I do to make it right? ~Unknown
5. Teach them to serve others by serving with them.
Each of you has received a gift to use to serve others. Be good servants of God’s various gifts of grace. 1 Peter 4:10
6. Teach them to be kind, have a zero-tolerance for cruelty and bullying.
When you talk, you should always be kind and pleasant so you will be able to answer everyone in the way you should. Colossians 4:6
“Kindness is more than deeds. It is an attitude, an expression, a look, a touch. It is anything that lifts another person.” ~Unknown
7. Teach them to always do their best . . . whether they win or lose do everything to glorify God.
So whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. 1 Corinthians 10:31
8. Teach them to try, allow them to fail and encourage them to try again . . . life itself is often the best teacher of humility.
Become a possibilitarian. No matter how dark things seem to be or actually are, raise your sights and see possibilities — aways see them, for they’re always there. ~Norman Vincent Peale
9. Teach them about strengths and weaknesses . . . talk about yours (they see them anyway) and help them identify theirs.
Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand. Isaiah 41:10
10. Model for them the things you are trying to teach them.
Show them humility. Show them confidence. Show them how to respect everyone no matter who they are or what they do. Show them the importance of kindness and listening to others. Show them the blessing of service. Show them the importance of trying when it would be easier to quit. Show them your faith and love for the One who made them for His plans and purposes.
You are not doing this humble confidence thing perfectly and your children are not going to get it right all the time either. It is something they, like you, will have to work at for the rest of their lives.
You can teach them. And the best part, you can't teach them without learning and growing yourself. God will use this in your life.
Don't give up. Teaching your children about humble confidence is an important way to love them well.
“I find the best way to love someone is not to change them, but instead, help them reveal the greatest version of themselves.” ~Steve Maraboli
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